Friday, August 19, 2022
Cold Thermogenesis

How Do I Handle the Grief After Having an Abortion?

How Do I Handle the Grief After Having an Abortion?
Send John your questions. Leave a voicemail at 844-693-3291 or email [email protected] We want to talk to YOU!

Download Dr. John Delony’s Anxiety Relief Checklist here:

Get a money plan for real life! Start your free trial of Ramsey+:

Learn how to change your thoughts, change your behaviors, and change your life. Subscribe to the Dr. Delony’s show!

Twitter (@johndelony)
Instagram (@johndelony)
Facebook (

These platforms contain content, including information provided by guests, that is intended for informational and entertainment purposes only. The content is not intended to replace or substitute for any professional medical, counseling, therapeutic, financial, legal, or other advice. The Lampo Group, LLC d/b/a Ramsey Solutions as well as its affiliates and subsidiaries (including their respective employees, agents and representatives) make no representations or warranties concerning the content and expressly disclaim any and all liability concerning the content including any treatment or action taken by any person following the information offered or provided within or through this show.

If you have specific concerns or a situation in which you require professional advice, you should consult with an appropriately trained and qualified professional expert and specialist. If you are having a health or mental health emergency, please call 9-1-1 immediately.

Ramsey Network (Subscribe Now!)

• The Ramsey Show (Highlights):
• The Ramsey Show (Full Episodes):
• The Dr. John Delony Show:
• The Chris Hogan Show:
• The Rachel Cruze Show:
• Anthony ONeal:
• The Ken Coleman Show:
• The Christy Wright Show:
• EntreLeadership:


Similar Posts

49 thoughts on “How Do I Handle the Grief After Having an Abortion?
  1. This young lady's call broke my heart…this is what evil and deception look like. No one should have to look back and try to feel comfortable with the fact of ending their child's life. That's just against everything Human…

  2. I wish that people would put more effort into preventing unwanted pregnancies. If you are not prepared to have a baby, practice abstinence or take birth control pills….or use condoms. It's that simple. So now she's in a position that she's ended a life and has to deal with this for the rest of her life.

  3. I am very proud of her for taking this first step and acknowledging her feelings. Regardless of why she made her decision, she has now been through a traumatic experience and she feels the loss. She and her boyfriend need to grieve the loss as the first step to move forward. ❤️

  4. This is why I never got an abortion. My first baby I lost naturally. My second was born 5.5 months ago and she is the biggest blessing I’ve ever had. I’m 35 and single and I don’t regret keeping her. I chose life because I never wanted this on my Conscience

  5. Women scream about my body my choice but nobody talks about the millions of women crying themselves to sleep 15-20 years later because they regret killing their own baby. We need to make adoption popular again!

  6. There are many other things that take a life. War, and death penalty. Even now being careless can cause someone with a compromised immune ststem to get Covid and die . We must be careful not to judge others. Only God can. Free will is extended to all. We should try to be supportive of others and hope we can help them avoid making the same mistake in the future.

  7. For Alex – I would like to recommend the Rachel's Vineyard retreat. It is a full weekend retreat that is specifically tailored for post abortive people (men come too). I volunteer at our local retreat and have seen amazing healing come from it.

  8. I had an abortion in the early 00s before the internet/info was truly at our fingertips. I thought it was just a clump of cells….l regret it now. I have forgiven myself and armed myself with info. I am now channeling this very sad situation into fighting abortion. I am here if you ever need to talk, sending you love.

  9. There is a heart beating at the end of 4 weeks. 💓 Technology wasnt advanced enough in our parents time for them to know that. They didnt know – but we do. We can be the generation that ends abortion.

  10. The "best" decision is never to take the life of a defenseless innocent human.

    Ladies (USA) – for every baby up for adoption – there are 20 families looking for a child to adopt. Demand for children outpaces the supply. You could have your pick of adoptive parents.

    Giving your child up for adoption will feel like putting your heart on a sacrificial altar. I get it.

    Adoption may not feel like a loving thing to do. Maybe you feel like you are giving up your child out of selfishness. But your not. Putting your child up for adoption is much harder then aborting your child. Abortion is the actual selfish thing to do – the parent doesnt want to feel the heart break of giving their child up after seeing them / eye contact.

    Adoption is the most selfLESS and sacrificial thing some parents can do. Adoption forces the parent to put the child first and the heart of the parent is laid down in service to another. The pain and heart break is terrible.

    Abortion or Adoption – both can be painful. But one sends someone on to have a better life – the other cuts life short. Pick which situation you want to be responsible for.

  11. I know women who had abortions. Most of them regret it. This is not talked about nearly as often as it needs to be. The prolife side will instantly condemn the woman (many of whom were girls who were pushed into it by adults close to them), the prochoice side will instantly condemn the woman for her grief. No matter who is in office, the Truth will be discovered when we come together and really talk about how abortion actually affects women and their families.

  12. I am so very happy that I kept my daughter, born in 1974. I have 2 beautiful grandchildren; one of each. She has a husband that takes care of his family and me, too. Blessed!

  13. So a child conceived out of love by intelligent people is gone…because the economical climate (student loans, jobs, prices)…and of course covid didn't help at all. Smh.

    Don't throw away babies conceived in love at least!! There's so many people who are infertile and wish they could adopt a healthy baby.

    She absolutely 'lost something' and she KNOWS this fact down to her soul.

  14. at 11:00 she implies that she did it partly because she couldn't afford a baby because of student loans burdening her financially. When are we going to realize the burden student loans put on young people in this country and do something about it?

  15. Its a gift and a skill to be able to put your own beliefs aside and help someone who is hurting. I really respect Dr John for being able to take the time to see the person behind the issue.

  16. I found John through Dave Ramsey. At first, I didn't think that I'd like his advice just based off of what I assume his lifestyle is. However, the more episodes I listen to, the more I appreciate his well rounded responses, despite what his personal beliefs may be (I know this sounds obvious, but there are so many counselors, psychologists, etc who let their personal biases really get in the way)

  17. Do you think heaven is full of babies and children? I mean, are they babies that angels are caring for, or are they children or adults? You know what I mean?

  18. I'm from Southeast Arkansas. In the winter, we get together and have bonfires. It's a way to still get w/ friends and family during the winter. It's also Southeast Arkansas and we don't really have much weather that prevents traveling. We are almost all from here, too, and we've grown accustomed to the shorter days in the winter.

  19. This is so heartbreaking. We live in an age where the most prominent message is that it's no big deal, and it's only after going through with it that so many women come to realize the gravity of what was done. Hoping she can find forgiveness and healing.

  20. In her whole sorry Defence- it was All about Me, Me, I, I, Me! Their was nothing about the innocent life she has murdered.
    Some ppl don’t deserve to have children- selfish. She threw away a life of happiness, joy and drama rollercoaster with a child.
    She doesn’t deserve to have children again- hope she regrets this day for rest of her life!

  21. No one has the right to tell any woman what to do with her own body.
    Full stop. Believe what you want, no one will force any woman to have an abortion, but its no one else's place to decide but that woman and her husband/partner.
    People that dont believe in abortion have that right, too and dont ever have to have one.

  22. John had an opportunity to guide this woman to repentance. Christ said, "come to me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest" and in Romans it says, "there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus". To allow a burdened sinner to remain in condemnation when we have the gospel is to fail as a Christian. We must speak truth to folks when we have the chance. It's loving to guide folks to the Lord, and a privilege to take part in the reconciliation of someone to Him. John, I'd encourage you to be a Christian first and a counselor second. It might feel weird but faithfulness to Christ in all areas of life is such a blessing despite the pushback you may receive.

    This woman murdered her child. She needs to repent and trust in Christ. It's not a "mistake" or "the best choice for me right now" because we as Christians believe children of all gestational stages are image-bearers of God, worthy of life and protection, especially by their parents.

  23. Such a pro. Withheld any kind of judgment. It’s kind of easy to assume Dr Jon doesn’t believe in abortion being a strong Christian… as an Atheist I really respect his feedback and instruction

  24. Women who abort their babies are 16x more likely to commit suicide. They won’t tell you this at the abortion clinics which is so sad. If they tell the women this then the women may back out and the clinic would lose out on money. God tells us not to abort for a reason. God loves us all, he teaches us what not to do for a reason. God can heal her if she repents and gives her life to Jesus ❤️

  25. Abortion causes such cognitive dissonance. The woman thinks she did the right thing, yet is stricken with grief. She's dealing with grief because she knows that murdering her child was deeply wrong, no two ways to slice it. I know this comment will strike a nerve for some folks. I don't apologize. It's the truth. May god have mercy on her soul.

  26. Wow Dr. Deloney,
    You handled that young ladies grief with such tenderness. I am pro-life, but I also believe Christ has compassion and love for the repentant. You probably saved her from a life of addiction.
    I am going to steal your quote in tough situations: "Love first, judge later."

  27. This seems like she was pushed into the decision more than she actually wanted to do it, and this is why she is still struggling.

    Also, she should be careful comparing herself with social media. People never post when they are overwhelmed with the responsibilities of having a child.

    Makes sense there would be grief. Nobody has abortions for fun. It doesn't mean it was a wrong decision.

  28. Heres my own story: my ex and I were together for 6 years and just 5 months ago she left me. This was 1 year after our abortion. I was supportive of her and offering anything I could depending on what we/she chose as a decision. I went to all the appointments, brought her to the day of the procedure, and even continued to tell her of my want of all of having a child with her in the future. I was supportive as best as I could to her decision, I never got mad, I was sad but I would only share that with my therapist. Her decision was based on her parents opinion and religious views. She was scared they would disown her, for example we lived together for 3 years during college and each time her parents visited I had to hide all of my stuff and leave for a little bit, so when we got pregnant she was very nervous about her parents opinion about being pregnant out of wedlock. I was planning on getting engaged about a year away as I had planned it all out financially etc.

    She broke up with me and told me she connects me to this horrible moment in her life and just wishes to bury it by finding coping strategies. She is in therapy. But she asked me to NOT contact her as she heals and that maybe in the future we can reconnect.

    This hurt and still hurts me deeply because she blamed her parents this entire time, then out of NOWHERE she tells me she is sad and connects me to the abortion still despite my efforts to support and be there for her.

    I love this woman and am doing my best to be the best man I can be if she comes back. Counting being loyal.

    If there are any suggestions aside from space and time, I would love them!!

  29. Dr. D, you are the most compassionate and rational mental health professional I have ever heard, and i've been sent to plenty socalled. Ceremony is a huge part of our denial culture (same with other issues) that are ignored. Bless your gift of healing, Dr. D. I have several grief ceremonies that I have been avoiding even tho I've faced and and am building resilience thru the loses. Reliquaries are another practical touchstone that women can use inconspicuously in our homes for a sacredplace to stop and grieve and most importantly Forgive Ourselves whenever we need to.

  30. I'm sorry to hear your struggle. But abortion is not for women to solve an issue because it's affecting women mostly and they are emotional being. It kills your inner soul. The answer is adoption.

  31. Listen to this woman’s pain. Woman think they can do this life altering thing, but it stays with you forever. I am pro life but I feel for this lady . She needs to be loved. God loves her so incredibly much.

  32. Wow. What a tough call and handled beautifully. I became pregnant for the first time at age 39. I was not married to the father but decided to have my son. I was thrilled to be a mother. My son is now 25. Having the baby was the right choice for me, but I will never judge another woman. Best wishes.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.